What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

What do you love to do at night when you’re alone?

TEXT:

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

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And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

When do you feel most peaceful ever?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Do you think all these charges that have been brought against Trump are just a coincidence? If he was such a big threat why did they wait 3 years to bring these charges? Or is this all just election interference?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

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Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

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Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!